Inside the Mind of the Quiet Part II

Last time I was conspicuously and suspiciously quiet, it was on a heated argument triggered in a classroom. This time, I had to bite my tongue inside my own home! Outside I might have seemed quiet and careless about the topic, but inside, I was burning in anger waiting for that moment to end.
So it was a typical Sunday night, my parents and I discussing typical issues. One way or another our conversation weirdly switched to the topic of the possibility of same sex marriage in Lebanon. Inside I was like:
Pfft, yeah right!
Then my dad seemed to get serious about the topic:
Sh*t, please not this topic, please not again.
“This is disgusting, they even have their own night clubs…” my dad said. I tried to distract myself (or at least seem like I was) by looking at the tv. I tried biting my nails, looking away, closing my eyes, drink water, nothing worked! Nothing worked to make my blush fade away, or at least stop my shaking and extinguish the fire burning inside of me.
Oh please, please, please someone change the topic! Gosh, gosh! If I talk, they would assume I’m gay and if I don’t, they would think the same. Please, please, please.
All I had to do was let the time do its job. Seconds flowed away between the “It’s against nature…” and the “It’s inhumane…” with rigor. Finally, silence began filling the room.
Yes, thank you, now I just need them to open a new subject or topic to break the awkward silence…
The room was filled with the awkwardness of silence only disturbed by the noise of the tv show. My parents opened another subject and all the insults and abuses were quickly forgotten as the guy on the tv began taking his shirt off, showing his body toned by the skilled acrobatic movements which he began to display, and that’s when I decided I had stayed up for longer than I needed and it was time to sleep.


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